DMV opens at 8 am. People had warned me that I will lose a big part of day and myself after my journey through those halls, especially if I go in without an appointment. I was told that if I wanted to come out while there was still some sunlight left in the day, I must get there an hour before 8 am.
My wife packed me water, Yakult and some lunch. She made sure that I put on sunscreen and a hat since the initial wait would be outside. She said a little prayer for me and lit a candle for me.
I was there 5 minutes before 7 am. There was a queue outside. Forty four people in the queue. I counted, since I had some time. I read the news on my phone. I looked around and observed the competition. I spoke to the person ahead of me and the person behind me briefly.
At 8.00 am, the gates opened. A lady asked each person why they had decided to make the pilgrim (or why they had been summoned). Depending on the answer, she gave them a paper form. Your answer also decided which queue you get to stand in. I was given the slower queue. At 8.15 am, I made it to the gate. At the gate, a man asked me why I was there. Then he checked if I had the right paperwork. Then I was asked to stand in a queue to enter a computer room.
Soon I was in the room and I was asked to fill out an application on the computer. When I finished the application, the computer generated a code for me. I was asked to note down this code on my paper form. I decided that I was going to guard this code with my life.
I was informed that by completing the computer room level, I had unlocked yet another queue. After an undetermined amount of time, I was talking to another lady. She asked me why I was there. By this time, I had started questioning this myself, and was wondering if I could survive by taking public transport and Ubers alone. She then proceeded to check my paperwork and then she gave me another code. I was sure that all of these codes will surely get me closer to my quest.
I was supposed to take a seat now, and wait for my second code to appear on a screen. So this time, the queue didn’t feel like a queue at all. You could sit anywhere, and the screen would do the queuing for you. Now I don’t understand why GG0049 was displayed before GG0048 (me), but I will never know.
Eventually my number was displayed and I found myself facing a man who was looking far away. I said, “hello sir”, but he just needed some time. In a couple of minutes, I had his attention. Then he asked me why I was there. He checked my paperwork. He reminded me of the sloths I saw in Zootopia. He slowly made copies of all my documents. He charged me some money. He scanned my ID. He took a thumbprint. He however, did not give me another code. I was a little disappointed. He handed me a printout and I was asked to stand in “Line C”. Line C ended and I met another man. This one asked me for the printout. He took my picture and took my thumbprint again.
I was told to enter the computer room again, but this time from the other end! It was like a video game map that looks exactly like a previous map, but feels different. I was asked to take any open computer. This was tricky, with people entering the room from two ends. Eventually I was faster than a competitor and was in front of a computer again. This was the biggest challenge. A test! I was prepared (most of the preparation done waiting in the queue at the DMV). I focused on the test, and though I got a couple of answers wrong, I had enough right to pass! I thought that the boss has been defeated, but there was a bonus stage. I was asked to stand in “Line D”.
This time, I met Mr. Sloth again. He made some more printouts. Took some of my old printouts. Finally he gave me what I came for. I wasn’t sure if I still wanted it though, since I had lost the will to live by then.
My wife packed me water, Yakult and some lunch. She made sure that I put on sunscreen and a hat since the initial wait would be outside. She said a little prayer for me and lit a candle for me.
I was there 5 minutes before 7 am. There was a queue outside. Forty four people in the queue. I counted, since I had some time. I read the news on my phone. I looked around and observed the competition. I spoke to the person ahead of me and the person behind me briefly.
At 8.00 am, the gates opened. A lady asked each person why they had decided to make the pilgrim (or why they had been summoned). Depending on the answer, she gave them a paper form. Your answer also decided which queue you get to stand in. I was given the slower queue. At 8.15 am, I made it to the gate. At the gate, a man asked me why I was there. Then he checked if I had the right paperwork. Then I was asked to stand in a queue to enter a computer room.
Soon I was in the room and I was asked to fill out an application on the computer. When I finished the application, the computer generated a code for me. I was asked to note down this code on my paper form. I decided that I was going to guard this code with my life.
I was informed that by completing the computer room level, I had unlocked yet another queue. After an undetermined amount of time, I was talking to another lady. She asked me why I was there. By this time, I had started questioning this myself, and was wondering if I could survive by taking public transport and Ubers alone. She then proceeded to check my paperwork and then she gave me another code. I was sure that all of these codes will surely get me closer to my quest.
I was supposed to take a seat now, and wait for my second code to appear on a screen. So this time, the queue didn’t feel like a queue at all. You could sit anywhere, and the screen would do the queuing for you. Now I don’t understand why GG0049 was displayed before GG0048 (me), but I will never know.
Eventually my number was displayed and I found myself facing a man who was looking far away. I said, “hello sir”, but he just needed some time. In a couple of minutes, I had his attention. Then he asked me why I was there. He checked my paperwork. He reminded me of the sloths I saw in Zootopia. He slowly made copies of all my documents. He charged me some money. He scanned my ID. He took a thumbprint. He however, did not give me another code. I was a little disappointed. He handed me a printout and I was asked to stand in “Line C”. Line C ended and I met another man. This one asked me for the printout. He took my picture and took my thumbprint again.
I was told to enter the computer room again, but this time from the other end! It was like a video game map that looks exactly like a previous map, but feels different. I was asked to take any open computer. This was tricky, with people entering the room from two ends. Eventually I was faster than a competitor and was in front of a computer again. This was the biggest challenge. A test! I was prepared (most of the preparation done waiting in the queue at the DMV). I focused on the test, and though I got a couple of answers wrong, I had enough right to pass! I thought that the boss has been defeated, but there was a bonus stage. I was asked to stand in “Line D”.
This time, I met Mr. Sloth again. He made some more printouts. Took some of my old printouts. Finally he gave me what I came for. I wasn’t sure if I still wanted it though, since I had lost the will to live by then.
I realized that visiting the DMV is like playing escape room, except that (a) you don’t choose to play it, (b) If you lose, there are real world consequences and (c) There’s no fun involved.
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